A Battle for our Hearts, Minds and Stomachs

There is a silent war raging in America. A war without weapons, but not without casualties. It’s tearing apart families and destroying relationships. Battles are taking place on college campuses, in homes, grocery stores, restaurants, on Match.com and Twitter. At stake in this conflict are our very souls, and our rightful position atop the food chain. I’m talking about the battle of herbivores versus omnivores.

For those of us in the trenches, the battles intensify with each passing year. Restaurants are bypassed due to a lack of vegetarian options. Side dishes are increasingly becoming main dishes at holiday dinners and office parties. And looks of disapproval are intensifying with each mouth-watering forkful of pork tenderloin braised with a white wine, rosemary and shallot reduction.

For some, this battle is about health. For some, it’s ethics. For others, it’s about freedom of choice. Discussing dietary lifestyles can be both emotionally and politically charged. Conservative versus liberal. Vegetarian versus Omnivore. Vegan versus Pescatarian.

The herbivore’s conundrum is their argument that we are just another one of God’s creatures. What gives us the right to kill and eat another of God’s creatures? The paradox is that God’s creatures are continuing to kill and eat each other on a regular basis. Ah, but we are a more evolved creature; on a higher plane than God’s “other” creatures. So if this is true, we are not “just” another of God’s creatures. We must be above them. And what better way to prove that we’re above them, than to kill and eat them?

The omnivore’s dilemma, well, apparently we’re nihilistic, unethical, heartless, earth scorchers because we occasionally enjoy buffalo wings or a McRib sandwich.

Personally, I make no judgments about one’s dietary choices. I am an omnivore, and no book, movie, television commercial or haiku will ever change this. I’ve even tried my own version of the 100-mile diet, eating only food processed at plants within 100 miles of my home. It was much harder than I thought, primarily because I don’t know my geography.

The way I see the animal kingdom is fairly simplistic. There are three types of animals; pets, food and everything else. I don’t condone the cruelty to any of these groups, though I wouldn’t scratch someone who occasionally kicks a cat off of my Christmas card list. Some cats are just asking for it.

All I ask in return is that others don’t make judgments about my dietary choices. Don’t recommend movies like, “Food Inc.”, books like, “The Omnivore’s Dilemma”, or CDs by Sarah McLaughin. Don’t make snide comments about the amount of nitrates in my bacon wrapped hot dog kabobs. And don’t expect me to eat arugula as an entrée on a regular basis. Everything in moderation. People who consistently criticize vegetarians tend to be somewhat Neanderthalic; and pure vegans, well let’s just say some can suck the fun right out of the room.

As the conflict intensifies, the omnivores appear to be losing ground. Up to 13% percent of the U.S. population considers themselves vegetarian or semi-vegetarian. Semi vegetarians may continue to eat eggs (ovo-vegetarian), or dairy (lacto-vegetarian), fish (pescatarian) or Jello and/or Jello Pudding Pops, which contain dairy and gelatin (Jello Pudding Popsatarian). An additional 17% of the U.S. population has indicated that they will likely reduce animal intake in the future. Great news for bean growers.

In the meantime, where the lives of omnivores and herbivores are intertwined, a psychological tug of war is taking place.

“You’re killing helpless animals.”
“I’m ridding the world of carbon producing cows. You’re killing oxygen-producing plants. Now who is the bad guy?”
“You’re going to die of heart disease.”
“You’re anemic.”
“You’re a heartless ogre.”
“I hear ogre is the new bison. I probably taste delicious. You’re high maintenance.”

Not all conflicts are this overt. Many of these messages are merely implied. But the battles are still very real, and each side believes they have a trump card. Herbivores secret weapon is their belief that vegetarianism will save the planet and the human race. And omnivore’s secret weapon is bacon.

Vegetarian web sites have sound the validation cry as they publish the latest vegetarian statistics and poll results. But like all battles, there are stories, like this, behind the statistics.   My job- to bring these stories to you.  More to come.